Over the course of my life, I have been blessed to have awesome colleagues. Today I was especially impressed by this as I talked and laughed with two women who make me smile whenever I think of them. Both of these ladies do not have kids right now, and are surrounded by women who have just joined the birthing club. They are the few who have not embarked on that journey - which, I want to interject, is awesome. It bothers me when people pressure others to have kids.. anyways, that is not where this post is going, and so I'll stop. Being the few grants them the fun of hearing the non-stop mommy talk about brands, pooping, boobies, and other awesome topics.
As we laughed about all of the fun topics that have come up, and the women who are passionately obsessed I was struck by a sense of truth in myself. I think I have had my bouts where I was one of those women who drove my friends crazy. Non-intentionally, but still... if you know me well, you know that if something has gotten me excited I have a hard time not sharing it. The poor people in the grocery store probably run now when they see my face light up over a bag of limes clearanced down to 99c... they know I will probably holler for them to check out the deals.. Anyways, I digress.
As we talked and laughed I commented on how most moms who are insecure are the ones who try to push things on others. As events have occurred and reflections have been made in the hours following, what I shared is ringing truer.
Insecurity - it is mean, it is fierce, and it can lead to so much pain. It has been a shadow in my life. At times it is a wisp of a struggle, and at others it is a full-forced battle. This has been my experience especially in parenting.
While many people who seem to have all of the parenting answers come across as secure, they often are more insecure than you would imagine. Most of the time the facade is a cover-up for them not knowing what they are doing, and responding to the pressures to compete to do it right and to do it the best. One big sign of insecurity is a person's unwillingness to learn from others.
I think what struck me tonight was not so much my struggles with insecurity so much as an insight into my growing in security. There were two parenting situations I observed today that really resonated with me. I felt like I learned something from both of these situations that I feel will help me be a better mom to my kids. I think being able to learn is a sign of growing and become more secure.
I think I have been guilty at pushing things on others in a response of feeling judged and not good enough as a parent. A huge chunk is also a response to the inferred belief that because people might be doing it differently I am doing it wrong and bad and I have to prove myself.
Sometimes I am guilty of pushing things on people because it pisses me off when they come across as having it all together, but they really are just struggling and doing things to make other people feel less-then.
(If you have been a recipient of this from me, I hope you will accept my apology. If you want to talk about it, please let me know)
Regardless, it is wrong and unloving. I don't think I am alone in this. Parenting, especially, is hard. The pressures to be good and do things right are hard enough - but we make things worse by acting out of insecurity and reacting rather than responding.
I'm sure this will continue to be a struggle, but a struggle is worth it. I love learning, and so many of the best decisions and attitudes in parenting Jon and I have made/had have been rooted in learning from others.
The conversation I had with the girls tonight was awesome, and the conviction that I have probably been one of those women has been good for me to face. It has also been so good to be encouraged by my growth as a parent, and simply in accepting myself a little more without having to prove or compare myself.
Thursday, May 15, 2014
Tuesday, May 6, 2014
Strawberry Jam - Less Sugar & More Fruit Flavor!
Tis the season for strawberries here in East Texas! We have a great orchard about 30 minutes or so from our place where we can go and pick strawberries. The prices are great and the strawberries are even better!
As I pulled out my handy Ball cookbook, I turned to the altered strawberry jame recipe I first concocted years ago after researching strawberry jam. The thing I love about this recipe is that it calls for nearly half the amount of sugar, and is so easy to make.
Typically, I am not a strawberry jam fan. The flavor is usually too sweet for me, and tastes more like candy than like the berry itself. This jam has more of a freezer jam flavor. It is bright, lovely, and the sugar accentuates the berry flavor.
This year I also discovered a method that made jam making even easier... so, without much further ado, here it is:
Strawberry Jam - Low Sugar
2 Quarts Strawberry Puree
1/4 C lemon or orange juice (the citrus is the key!)
1 pouch pectin
4C sugar (normally this recipe calls for 7-8C sugar)
Method
Preparation of Canning Tools
Before beginning, fill your canning pot with hot water. Place covered pot on a burner. Heat on high through the entire process of making the jam until the water is boiling.
Tip: If you want to be efficient, place your empty jars in the water and let them heat with the water. This will sterilize them
Take a small saucepan, fill with about 1in deep of water, and heat on low with the sealing lids inside.
Make an area next to the stove that you can place the hot jars onto. Have all of your tools ready to go. I use the magnetic lid picker-upper, canning funnel, and the tongs for grabbing the hot jars. Don't forget your rings to hold the lids on tight, and a wash cloth for wiping the jars tops clean.. and just wiping up messes (well.. you can just use your fingers if you want.. it is delicious!)
Making the Jam
Puree the berries. I simply hulled them, and placed them in the blender. Blended until smooth, and then measured 2 quarts. (You can always hand mash... I did this until this year. I will not do this again)
In a large pot, combine the berry puree, juice and pectin. Heat to boiling. Stir as often as you see fit.
Once boiling, add the sugar and stir well. Keep stirring as needed until the jam hits a hard boil. Make sure you are stirring constantly at this stage - the jam likes to grow! Hard boil for a minute.
If your jam is foamy, or you care, add a tablespoon or so of butter to cut down on the foam.
Canning the Jam
If you are working with a partner, begin taking out the jars and dumping the piping hot water back into the canning pot. Line them up next to stove - or wherever you will fill them. If working by yourself, wait until the hard boil is over and your jam has settled down to get your jars ready.
Using a ladle, scoop the hot jam into each jar until about 1/4in from the top.
Wipe up any jam that has landed on the jar with a damp rag.
Place toppers on jars and screw on the ring - you might want to use the towel to hold the jar. It will be very hot.
Place all jars back in canning pot and cover. Once the water begins boiling again (it usually will slow down), put your timer on 10min
Finishing Up
Once the timer goes off, use your canning tongs to take the jars from the pot and set where they can sit and cool undisturbed.
Within the next 10-15min you should hear all of your jars happily pop!
Enjoy! This jam is a beautiful soft-set jam that spreads well and tastes phenomenal!
Typically, I am not a strawberry jam fan. The flavor is usually too sweet for me, and tastes more like candy than like the berry itself. This jam has more of a freezer jam flavor. It is bright, lovely, and the sugar accentuates the berry flavor.
This year I also discovered a method that made jam making even easier... so, without much further ado, here it is:
Strawberry Jam - Low Sugar
2 Quarts Strawberry Puree
1/4 C lemon or orange juice (the citrus is the key!)
1 pouch pectin
4C sugar (normally this recipe calls for 7-8C sugar)
Method
Preparation of Canning Tools
Before beginning, fill your canning pot with hot water. Place covered pot on a burner. Heat on high through the entire process of making the jam until the water is boiling.
Tip: If you want to be efficient, place your empty jars in the water and let them heat with the water. This will sterilize them
Take a small saucepan, fill with about 1in deep of water, and heat on low with the sealing lids inside.
Make an area next to the stove that you can place the hot jars onto. Have all of your tools ready to go. I use the magnetic lid picker-upper, canning funnel, and the tongs for grabbing the hot jars. Don't forget your rings to hold the lids on tight, and a wash cloth for wiping the jars tops clean.. and just wiping up messes (well.. you can just use your fingers if you want.. it is delicious!)
 |
| These babies are red through the center! |
Puree the berries. I simply hulled them, and placed them in the blender. Blended until smooth, and then measured 2 quarts. (You can always hand mash... I did this until this year. I will not do this again)
In a large pot, combine the berry puree, juice and pectin. Heat to boiling. Stir as often as you see fit.
Once boiling, add the sugar and stir well. Keep stirring as needed until the jam hits a hard boil. Make sure you are stirring constantly at this stage - the jam likes to grow! Hard boil for a minute.
If your jam is foamy, or you care, add a tablespoon or so of butter to cut down on the foam.
If you are working with a partner, begin taking out the jars and dumping the piping hot water back into the canning pot. Line them up next to stove - or wherever you will fill them. If working by yourself, wait until the hard boil is over and your jam has settled down to get your jars ready.
Using a ladle, scoop the hot jam into each jar until about 1/4in from the top.
Wipe up any jam that has landed on the jar with a damp rag.
Place toppers on jars and screw on the ring - you might want to use the towel to hold the jar. It will be very hot.
Place all jars back in canning pot and cover. Once the water begins boiling again (it usually will slow down), put your timer on 10min
Once the timer goes off, use your canning tongs to take the jars from the pot and set where they can sit and cool undisturbed.
Within the next 10-15min you should hear all of your jars happily pop!
Enjoy! This jam is a beautiful soft-set jam that spreads well and tastes phenomenal!
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