A Haircut - It can be revolutionary!

So, we cut Ezzie's hair for the 2nd time. This time we pulled out Jon's clippers and gave little man a shave. I was not prepared for my gut reaction. I knew he would look different. Knew he'd probably look more grown up, and even wondered if he would look more like he did when his hair was that short at about 3 months. Wow - my reaction was so much more.

I felt like my son had grown from a 15-month sweetie into a possible punk kid. I immediately found myself unsure of his temperament and wondered if he was going to stop smiling and giving my those grins that delight my heart. I have no idea why a haircut spurred these feelings and gut reactions, but as soon as I vocalized my feelings I was grateful for Jon reminding me that Ezzie had not changed.

I feel there is a great lesson to learn from this for the future. I have no idea what may cause me to stop and question who my son is, and even other people in my life again. I hope that when I do, I will remember this haircut - something so small and completely unconnected to who my son is and remember the truth that I know about him, others, myself, and even God.

Sometimes that truth is hard for me to hold onto. Last night I had a very rough night, and Jon spent a good portion of it just holding me as I cried and hurt over questioning my worth, value and significance. His comfort, and God's peace finally lulled me into a sleep where I woke up with peace in my heart. See, nothing had changed my worth or value to anyone, except for my own perception... my haircut.

I wish everything could be as simple as "that haircut didn't change who he is," but it is not. Things are more complicated, but in essence, perception is not always truth. I know Ezzie will have more haircuts, and possibly make other choices that are really out there. I am so grateful for Jon in my life. It is amazing to have him as my partner in life.

So, my thoughts for today. And, a cute pic to leave you with.