The time is coming...

very soon where we will get to meet our little girl!  I am filled with excitement, nervousness, and a little anxiety.  For those of you who know me well, you know it takes me quite a while to process my emotions and responses to situations.  I usually hit a depression and take a while to even realize I am in it, and why.  With Ezzie this happened after his birth due to a lot of factors - broken trust with my doctor, the shear shock of how hard the labor experience was, his 5-week undiagnosed diaper rash which became obvious as thrush based on my symptoms, his surprise hospital visit and horrible spinal among other things, and just the transition from working to being at home full-time.  I hit a major depression which put me on the couch crying for hours each day, and Jon reaching out the best he could and lots of prayer and support.

Why do I mention these things?  Well, I want to step into this next phase of my life aware of what I have been through, affirming myself in what has occurred, and being ready to embrace and work through whatever comes our way with Pi so that I hopefully can bypass the months of depression and the length of more than a year it has taken me to be ok with who I am as a mother, woman and wife as I adjusted to becoming a mom.

When we found out Pi was a girl I teared up - I was so excited.  I am still just as thrilled.  She is a gift from God, just like her big brother Ezzie.  Jon and I are so blessed to even be able to add another member to our family.  I have no idea what it is like to have 2 children, but even with the nervousness of how we will adjust I am really excited to see our family grow.

I have been reading up on babies again... even though Ezzie will only be 21 months when Pi arrives, I don't really remember when he did what (I'll probably have to review his calendar to double check these things :))!  I am reading through The Baby Whisperer right now and really enjoying it.  The review is very helpful!

Well, I know these updates are few and far between.  I think part of my not updating has come from me pulling into my shell a bit more simply because we are about to embark on a major transition in our lives.  Here is a picture of me at 36 weeks... not sure how much she can grow in me at this point :)